New PoemsPosted: April 25, 2015
A lot of people don’t know this about me because it isn’t true but I’m a poet. Here’s some of my new work. They will be featured in “The Stem and the Cum Quarterly” as well as “Crow Mother International” and “Sports Illustrated”.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Give me back my fucking daughter.
You said I was a dick or a prick
or one of those ick words
and I should apologize to your roommate
The dumb bag of tits
What? Am I supposed to apologize to the toilet every time I shit?
It’s a toilet
What I mean to say is
Your roommate is a toilet
Can I get a vodka ton-
Oh, you aren’t a bartender.
You’re a wet nurse.
This is a hospital.
Can I get a White Russian?